i cut      my hair      short
after you left
to reduce the parts of me that grieved

and i continued
until all that remained was
an eye an ear
a little finger

just in case

she watched the smoke the cigarette her hand
and felt the fissure    form
      frighten butterflies
already flapping in her                     gut

the silence turned her                      head
but not her                                      eyes
as shadows darted in
and out of focus
across that marble mouth
that mouth like waves of sand crumbling
at the corners
filling empty valleys grain
by grain

the fissure widened
tearing her in half the                       collar bone
snapping with the pressure
until at last
she lay in a dustheap at her feet

**

she turned her gaze
searched a moment

smiled

and the fissure shut
snapping together like a magnet

the effect

of a stone burrowing its way into my heart is a twisted intestine then nausea then tears which i like to imagine sprinkled all over my face under the skin converge in my eye sockets all tired empty gestures because nothing comes out i try weakly not to cry into your shoulder because that's it i'm finished i'm finished i say not really meaning it

enough

the grinding halt of
birdsong throttled
and in its wake the scattered
ashes of a setting sun

tonight let's dream of roses
and drift along their petal-paths
into a rounded maze

let's spin into the serpent's lair

let's run the course and wait
until a scarlet breath
finds succour in our veins

until the dust has settled
and all around are golden apples
ripe with memory